November 2022

November 30, 2022

Lyra is off school today as they are doing ARD meetings. It used to be we had to schlep into town (her in uniform) for the fifteen minute appointment with her form tutor. Over Covid, the school shifted to doing them online, and haven’t gone back since. A much better use of everyone’s time.

The drilling was noticeably quieter – they must be taking those measures to reduce noise and vibration that Alex signed up to in the party wall agreement. They clearly haven’t been doing it up to now. Found a bottle of wine and a note of apology from Alex on the doorstep. Maybe I’ll stop hating him a bit short of eternity…;-)

Lyra needed an A2 canvas for her art exam, so I drove her to Muswell Hill to buy one. It was like threading a needle getting the car out of the array of vehicles piled up at the edge of the forecourt. Popped into a few shops while we were there and had a bento lunch at a Japanese restaurant.

Carried on with beauty work when I got back and sent a series of project manag-y emails setting out precisely what I need from them in terms of content and sign-off.

Neither of us were particularly hungry, and fixed a snack plate for dinner along with episode of Shameless. A very good piece of television, but neverending… Phoned Beulah to check in and have a chat but she was throwing a little bridge evening so we didn’t talk long.  To bed about 11pm.

November 29, 2022

I’d planned to move the car early before the building flotilla arrived so that driving Lyra wasn’t an issue, but by 6:45am there was already a car parked in front of John’s house, tight against the tree. Lights on, engine running… To be fair, there was enough room to squeeze through, but I could have done without the headlights shining directly into my mirrors. It’s very tempting to hate these new neighbours to eternity and beyond…;-)

Finally had the much-postponed coffee with Jemima. It’s been rescheduled three times, and I was starting to think it wouldn’t happen. She’s been having some health issues that sound worrying, and has had to lay off the cold water swimming while awaiting tests on her heart.

Walked down to Pond later than usual, arriving about 11:30am. It was very quiet and I had the water to myself at times. A cold, clammy gray day, and the water was at water at 8°C. Every swim is different – the light, the birdlife, even the weight of the water…

Back home, I made a hot sandwich for lunch and cuddled under the electric throw for a stretch. Adam called from Toronto, wanting my national insurance number as part of a business loan application. I gave it to him but want to know why in case I’m incurring potential liability.

The noise next door is relentless, a brutal onslaught of sound that sets the couch vibrating. The party wall agreement say that they will take reasonable measures to reduce noise and vibration. I don’t know what that means, but we’ve texted Alex to see if anything can be done.

Managed to have a phone call with Nova, who thought I must be standing in the middle of a busy intersection. Fortunately they packed it not long after. Lyra came in and the three of us had really nice visit.

Published the approved Canadian web pages, then made a late dinner  – creamy white beans with herb oil and a slice of sourdough toast, delicious. We like our peasant food round here…

November 28, 2022

Got Lyra off to school as per usual, and not long after Adam headed to Heathrow. I’m feeling a little glum, and my mood was not improved by the drilling starting up next door shortly after 8am.

It was too wet to consider running, so I jammed my air pods in my ears and worked. Amending text for the Canadian giving website, which has its tricky aspects. The template is quite locked down but they have tripled the content in places, which means finding ways to bend the tempate to accommodate it.

That fucking facebook pixel has reared its head again. I don’t know what is going on there. I’ve followed all the instructions my end, installed the plugin they suggested, watched a video on how to configure it and received emails from FB suggesting the ads are being tracked.

I did this on November 11 and sent an email to the agency leading on it saying it was done, to check it their end and let me know if they needed anything further from me. Today they popped up to say that things weren’t configured right, the ads weren’t working and I needed to install the plugin…

The Whittington called with a date for my eye op of January 9. I’m glad it’s the other side of the Christmas break…

Lyra went back to Liz’s after school and stayed there for until 9pm. Shelved my dinner plan and had leftovers – celeriac soup, last of the stewed plums and Barbados cream. Watched the latest episode of The White Lotus, which they are releasing week by week. Very much enjoying it.

November 27, 2022

Everyone slept until 9am. I thought the dog would have woken Lyra demanding a trip to the green, but Luna was totally chilled when I opened the door. Adam took her for a little walk before we dropped her home. Rachel and Richard were feeling pretty blue as a friend of theirs died on Friday. She was a mutual colleague of Rachel’s and the bride, which cast a pall over the wedding.

Pancakes for brunch, then spent the afternoon catching up the family budget. Adam hasn’t sent me any of his numbers since June. I’m not sure why were are doing it or at least if we are doing it in the best way. It’s definitely a good thing to keep a handle on what we’re spending and where.

It took so long that we ended up ordering takeaway for dinner from Shai Paakwan to supplement the keema curry. Their website never works and it’s always a palaver, but Adam likes their gormless marketing and their food. I’m more of a Kipling girl myself.

This time they messed up Lyra’s peshwari naan. It was like an April Fool’s prank where you mix up the salt and sugar. It took ages to communicate this with the man who answers the phone, who persisted in thinking we were complaining that it was too sweet. “Yes, yes, peshwari naan very sweet. Very sweet!” Eventually he went to talk to the kitchen and came back singing a different tune. They sent up a fresh naan and some complementary poppodums.

Put together a little proposal for Richard’s copywriting work, which took until gone midnight. Adam off ot Canada tomorrow…

November 26, 2022

Headed down to the ponds with Adam for an icy dip – the women’s is down to 8°C now. It’s still surprisingly busy – cold water swimming clearly having a moment with the young folk.

There were two girls about Nova’s age getting changed with me, and I overheard their conversation. They had travelled up from south London for their first-ever pond swim. The lifeguard made them do the test where you swim along the edge of the dock between the two ladders, then told them that was enough for a first visit.

I only did two laps myself, which was plenty at this temperature. Though how much I feel up to varies from day to day…

Had an egg benedict for my Kalendar breakfast. Didn’t buy groceries afterwards, aside from an orange to zest into the Christmas cake. Adam double-lined the tin while I made the batter and baked it.

Luna came round for a sleepover as Richard and Rachel are attending a wedding in town. Lyra is meant to be doing the dogsitting, but it’s Ellie’s birthday and she was out until evening. Adam took Luna for a wee before heading off to the optometrists and to visit Beulah.

When he returned we ate the leftover mushroom stew and watched a couple of episodes of  The Crown. Lyra returned about 9pm with Liz and took Luna downstairs with her. To bed about 11pm…

November 25, 2022

Managed to shift my ass and go for a run – 2.25 gentle miles. I’m too slack about the running these days. I think my commitment to the swimming has superceded it. It’s hard to find an exercise slot every weekday morning, and it’s currently more important to me to keep up the swimming routine.

Adam headed off early to host a post-party coffee meetup and Richard came round to discuss some copywriting work for his new company’s website. It was difficult to hold a conversation over the crazy noise levels and vibrating furniture.

Went around with a pencil and marked the end of the cracks in the plaster to track whether the construction has an impact then photographed them. The party wall guys didn’t inspect upstairs, as they didn’t expect the work would affect the top floor!

Worked on a content updating project I got through the Canadian office, which needs to be in place by Monday. Also put in some time on interpreting the revised style guide for my beauty client for the website.

Adam surprised me by coming home in the afternoon, saying he hadn’t seen enough of me what with the travelling and partying and breakfasting. As it turned out, he spent the whole afternoon in meetings anyway. At 6:45 I headed to a yoga class with Rachel and he and Lyra drove to Will and Sarah’s to watch the England match.

The class was at a yoga studio in the High Street I’ve been meaning to try out. It was a yin yoga class (a new one on me), which involved settling into deep stretches and holding them for a long time with the aid of blocks and bolsters. At the end, we had a “sound bath”, where we settled under blankets, closed our eyes and relaxed while the instructor struck a series of chimes and bells. That part was the best bit.

Home about 8:30. Fixed myself some dinner and watched two episodes of The White Lotus.

November 24, 2022

Both Lyra and I were a bit tired this morning… Her art and textiles course work is so time consuming – she was working on her painting until 11pm last night. Got her breakfast and lunch sorted, and Adam drove her down to the bus.

I walked to the Pond for a restorative 9°C dip. It is a trippy experience exposing yourself to that kind of cold. I’m still surprised at how I’m able to just lower myself in and start swimming. I’m very aware of the cold for the first lap, the second is kind of neutral, and by the third my fingers are really feeling it despite the gloves.

Lynne was there at the same time so we walked back to the village together. She and Duncan, Vince, Danni and Helen are all spending Christmas in Colombia, joining their kids who are backpacking for six months. She’s told me before, but is clearly pretty excited about it. It certainly is the destination of the moment – I know of four other people who are there right now…

Haringey planners came round to inspect the looming school building site from our perspective. Which is that we are so close to the planned works that you can consider us to be living on the building site.

Adam headed off after that and is out tonight. The minute he left the drilling started up next door. They are sawing the balcony off the house, and making a horrendous racket. Fucking tedious…

Just Lyra and me for dinner – a lamb keema curry and rice, which turned out nicely. After dinner, she worked on her oil painting of me, which is pretty good imho.

November 23, 2022

Miserable weather this morning – cold, wet, windy… Another day, another excuse not to go running…

Polished up the media hub page for the beauty site and sent it across. I think it looks pretty good. Next up for that website is rebuilding the membership options box. At present, it is generated by the membership database, but they want me to include their patronage scheme, which works differently . Took me a while to work out that I’ll have to build something bespoke, rather than attempt to shoehorn patronage into the membership database.

The noise is maybe a tiny bit more manageable today although all things are relative. Shades of “I like to bang my head on the wall because it feels so good when I stop…”

Adam got home from Amsterdam in the early evening. Unfortunately, his sales meeting that meant we didn’t eat together anyway. Made a roast vegetable and orzo dish from the new Moro cookbook, and had the plums from last weekend for dessert. Watched a couple of episodes of The Crown before bed.

November 22, 2022

Did Lyra’s food and drove her to the bus stop. It was a hassle getting the car out round the builder’s vehicles and . Nicolette’s waiting taxi didn’t help…

Instead of coming straight home, I parked up and walked across to the ladies pond for a swim. It was a very cold day. The air temperature was close to freezing and the water down to 9°C.

I thought about only doing two laps like Saturday, but then decided to push to three. My hands were pretty icy by the time I got out of the water but otherwise didn’t feel that different. There’s a rule of thumb that you should stay in for only one minute for each degree, so I should take a look at how long the laps are actually taking me.

They are going great guns next door, and clearly using power tools to chisel the plaster/concrete off the party wall, chucking it into the pit outside. There’s also some drilling into the brickwork at the back of the house. The noise was hellish… I managed by wearing my noise cancelling ear buds, but they eventually died…

No surprise I couldn’t hear the grocery guy ringing the doorbell – I couldn’t hear myself think. Adam had to text me from Amsterdam to alert me the delivery guy was outside. I felt drained and abused by the end of the day and had a nasty headache as well…

Sweet potatoes and couscous for dinner. A nice, low-on-the-totem pole meal we used to make regularly. Watched a Shameless, then White Lotus after she sloped off downstairs.

November 21, 2022

Adam headed off to Amsterdam early so I had to do both the meal prep and the driving. He’s back on Wednesday night. It was too horrible out to contemplate running. I did some house stuff I didn’t have the energy for when we got back yesterday and then settled down to client work.

The crew is working next door for the first time since mid-September. Unloaded a pile of what looked like scaffolding – pipes and joints – with a great amount of crashing and banging. I thought they might be putting it up front for some reason, but it appears it’s either for use indoors or on the back when they build the extension.

Made spinach and cheese quesadillas for our dinner…

November 20, 2022

Slept until about 9am… Just as well, I would undoubtedly have felt worse if I’d woken earlier. Came down for breakfast to discover we were all feeling delicate. Quite the unexpectedly big night. It’s funny how that can happen…

Went for a ittle walk round Wivelicoombe, which is a lovely town. If I was going to live in small town Britain, I’d be reasonably happy with this place. There were grand old buildings, some interesting shops and eateries, nice vistas out over the hills, and an open air swimming pool.

Turns out Ben and Michaela live only six miles from the field we are in the process of buying. That’s a happy coincidence – we’ll have somewhere to stay next time we visit it. They also have some local connections which may prove helpful when it comes time for the rewilding.

Got on the road just after noon in order to meet Nova at a cafe called Rock Salt for lunch. I was initially unconvinced by the menu, which was half Indian and half Chinese, but the tasty food completely won over.

Nova in good form, busy with her dissertation and working at the African restaurant a few shifts a week. I brought her a warmth care package  – slippers, hot water bottle and big wooly cardi – like many Brits, they have yet to turn the heating on, despite the temperature being in the single digits.

We were back on the motorway about 4pm. Crappy journey and we got in about 6:30. Lyra worked at Kalendar today, another four hour shift and seemed to have had a fun, productive weekend. Watched a couple of episodes of the new series of The Crown before bed.

November 19, 2022

I didn’t feel remotely like making a pumpkin pie when I woke up this morning. We didn’t drink that much, but I stayed up too late. We needed a functioning pie and was also determined to swim before setting off to see Ben and Michaela in Somerset.

Tried to save time by not chilling the pastry after rolling it out, which was a mistake. It shrunk massively during the pre-bake and I had to stretch it back into position with my bare hands while Adam gingerly poured in the filling.

Packed and sorted various things out while the pie baked, and fortunately it turned out okay. It was 10°C at the pond today – the lowest temperature yet. The feeling of that icy water on the throat is a singular sensation. My gloves are no match for my poor circulation, and my hands were like ice blocks by the time I was done.

Back home, we did a quick turnaround and hit the road. The traffic was crappy, an it took an extra half hour to get to Heathrow, but the journey was okay after that. Arrived before 5:30 in their town of Wiveliscoome(?). Ben came out to meet us.  They live in the High Street and don’t have off-street parking, so he’d saved us a spot with their car.

Their new house is very unusual. A converted pub, it has six or seven bedrooms, and is five storeys high if you count the cellar. It’s quite the change from their cottage in Oxted and I think they’re a bit overwhelmed by the work required to turn it into a family home (I certainly would be.)

Not that they actually need a family home. Aphra is 24 and lives in York (though she was back for the weekend) and Poppy (who now goes by Cam) is in their second year of theatre director studies at Plymouth.

After a gin and tonic, we set down to a full veggie Thanksgiving meal and copious amounts of wine. I have no idea why we drank so much wine, and am not sure when we went to bed. It was great to see them and there was lots to talk about, but honestly!

November 18, 2022

We had Will and Sara round for dinner this evening, which pretty much dictated my day. I had my usual start and did manage to get a run in but other than that evening preparations dominated: grocery shopping, housework, cooking etc.

The menu: olives/almonds/taralli; mushroom, Guinness and root veg stew with mash; spinach salad with lemon and mint; wine poached plums with Barbados cream.

They arrived about 8pm and we sat down with a negroni while I made the mash. Actually, Will has stopped drinking to try to control his high blood pressure. He lost his dad a few months back (I think a stroke may have been involved), he’s about to turn 60, and I suspect he’s feeling his mortality.

Lyra was over at Huxley’s house in Hampstead with a few other friends. She was keen to sleep over, and mounted a texting campaign to that effect. I don’t know the family (or the boy for that matter), and when it turned out his parents were away I said no. She gave some push back, but eventually took it with good grace.

Apparently, I’m unique and embarrassing in wanting an address and the contact details of a parent before she can stay somewhere. I’m surprised other parents don’t require the same. The thought of Lyra not coming home as expected and having to tell the police that my teenage daughter was sleeping I’m not sure where with I don’t know who is unthinkable.

To bed about 1:30am…

November 17, 2022

Felt a bit tired this morning and didn’t fancy walking down to the pond for a cold and rainy swim. Once Lyra was off I meditated then started in on the desk work promptly – wireframing the new patrons page for the beauty site.

Knocked off at 12:30 and walked across the Heath to Hampstead station where I met Adam to look at a flat. It is currently being rented and was pretty scruffy – it would take a lot of work to turn it into somewhere we would want to live. The location was great, but the building itself was pretty unloved.

Took transport home and got stuck into work again for the rest of the afternoon, aside from taking the time to make a pot of barley lentil soup for dinner. Lyra had just enough time for a bowl before she needed to be at Nick and Tessa’s to dogsit while they went to the cinema. Their dog is disabled and unable to drink so it requires someone to feed it ice chips… (I’ll leave that there…)

Another gig at the Roundhouse tonight – Ezra Furman this time. Took the car, and parked illegally a couple of streets away. Excellent performance, and unlike with the Mountain Goats I knew pretty much the entire playlist. No parking ticket either, so all in all a very good evening.

November 16, 2022

Miserable weather this morning dissuaded me from going for my run. I’ve become such a fair weather runner – I’m just not feeling the motivation at the moment.

Sorted Lyra, did my various word puzzles and Spanish, and spent too long on Twitter – a real energy drain, and so seldom the source of anything positive (though it can be very funny). Today I learned that the UK has the highest energy bills in the world. Easy to believe, based on our latest bill…

Yet more snagging to do on the purpose website – built a template to display all the posts for each author, and fixed something that had gone awry with the blog template. Also did a chunk of work on the new Patrons section for the beauty website. I’ve been neglecting my regular clients the last couple of weeks.

I’d bought tickets to see the Mountain Goats at the Roundhouse this evening, and made dinner early so we could eat together before we went out. Adam said he’d be home around 7pm, but totally blew that off which I found pretty annoying. Managed to avoid a full-on fight when he got in, but headed off to the gig unfed and grumpy.

A pint of beer and an excellent gig restored our spirits. I love John Darnielle – his intelligence, humour and humanity. He played their biggest hits, and a few others I knew but their catalogue is vast and some of the songs were new to me. Home just after 11pm and to bed.

November 15, 2022

Slept like a log last night, submerged in vivid dreams. The kind that cling like wet clothing when you wake, nudging into your thoughts until you realise you no longer need to find your lost suitcase with the essential items that you can’t quite recall…

Did the usual morning duties, then headed down for a swim in the pond. It was raining steadily, and the water temperature was down to 10.5. Didn’t feel the difference as much as I sometimes seem to – maybe the temperature has dropped to the point where another degree doesn’t make that much difference? We shall see…

Jemima and I had arranged to meet for a coffee at Gail’s – rescheduled for third time – but she blew me off again. A twisted ankle prevented her from walking to the village.

Put in a few decent hours of client work, mainly finalising things on the purpose economy site, but also some updates for the Kenyan site, which I haven’t worked on for a long time. I didn’t invoice them all through 2021, but I’ve noticed that almost every website I’ve built crops up again sooner or later.

Lyra went back to Liz’s after school so it was just Adam and me for dinner – cream of tomato soup, bruschetta and the finale of House of the Dragon.

November 14, 2022

Happy 53rd birthday, Wade! (and King Charles…)
Adam pulled an all-nighter getting a proposal out, so I suppose I should be grateful for my lousy 3.5 hour sleep… Got Lyra’s food sorted and went back to bed thinking I might grab another hour, but it didn’t happen.

My run didn’t happen either… Eased into the day with a bit more coffee than usual, and a low-energy approach to my workload. The purpose economy site is soft-launched now, so the pressure is off there. There are sundry things to do around snagging, privacy statement etc., but it’s in a good place.

Lyra got her predicted grades today, which she’ll use to apply for sixth form places – As and A*s in English, History, Geography, RS, Art, and Textiles and predicted Bs in Maths, Physics, Chemistry and Biology. She’s rightly pleased with that, and given the extra work she’s putting into maths and science, she may well improve on a couple of those.

Had a long phone call with Wade to wish him a happy birthday. They did the birthday dinner out on Saturday, and his plans for the day are to check out the new pool which opens today and to order an Indian takeaway for dinner. We had a roast tofu and sweet potato dish over rice (another one from the New York Times). Fine, but nothing I’d bother making again.

Penultimate episode of House of Dragon tonight. Adam and I have a difference of opinion about how it’s going to pan out. I’m backing the princess, while he thinks she’s toast…

November 13, 2022

An extraordinarily lazy day round here. To start, everyone slept in well past the time we normally wake. Ava’s mum finally phoned and chased her home. Ate brunch in my pjs – eggs, halloumi, mushrooms etc.

After that I spent a chunk of the afternoon reading my current novel, Glory, which I’ve really bogged down in. Adam headed over to Finchley to see his mum, and Lyra went out to catch up with Olive.

For dinner I made oxtail braised with celery.  I’ve always been very partial to oxtail, and this dish was an unctious, slow-cooked marvel. Watched a couple of episodes of Community. We’re in the third season now, and I’d say it’s starting to go off the boil.

Adam had work to do, so I finished my Strike audiobook while doing some knitting. Dozed off for an hour or so then took myself off to bed.

That nap meant that I wasn’t able to sleep, and ended up deepdiving into the US mid-term election results. Apparently there is a narrow path to the Democrats holding the house, though it’s pretty unlikely. American politics depress the hell out of me…

November 12, 2022

There were four cormorants sharing the Pond with us this morning, which brought a different sort of energy. They were very busy for one thing, plunging below the surface, then bobbing up a surprising distance away, planting themselves on the life buoys and stretching and flapping their enormous wings to dry them, fixing you with a beady, calculating stare as you swam past…

Grabbed a coffee in Swains Lane, then bought some groceries – mackerel for tonight (as Lyra is out at her friend Lulu’s birthday dinner), and oxtail for tomorrow. That walk up the hill certainly gets the blood pumping…

Made a quichey thing for brunch – we are overwhelmed with eggs at the moment, what I do to use up extra stuff. I get through some of them by making egg salad or batches of devilled eggs, but it’s hard to keep up.

Carried on watching House of the Dragon, a prequel to Game of Thrones, and were half way through by the end of the evening. The mackerel – panfried with a sauce of mustard, oil, sherry vinegar, basil, olives, diced tomato, and green beans on the side – turned out nicely.

Lyra got back with Ava at around 11pm. Sounds like a really nice evening – paella, party games, and everyone dressed to the nines…

November 11, 2022

Another run in the woods this morning. I was definitely moving better today and my time was faster as well. As usual, I encountered Kate and Chris on my loop, and ended up going back to Kate’s afterwards for coffee and a catch up.

Home just in time for the Remembrance Day service on the parade ground. I’m glad they’ve started doing that – I always stand at the dining room window for it and join vicariously. It’s strange to me how it isn’t a holiday here – all my Canadian colleagues are off work today.

Adam was out at his book group this evening. Lyra and I had Japanese curry and rice and watched We Need to Talk About Kevin. Good film, and the kind of thing that will stay with me…

November 10, 2022

Too busy and too rainy for a swim this morning. I got Lyra organised and off to school, and then settled down to work. A few niggling issues to work out with the social purpose website before go-live, and I needed to put in time on some other projects as well.

The beauty site has engaged an agency to help them with some Facebook advertising. This has required me to integrated bits of FB code into the website structure.The whole thing has been a headache, but I think I’ve finally got it working.

The social purpose website didn’t go smoothly…:-( There were obstacles to getting the DNS set up, and then the migration itself didn’t quite come off. I couldn’t import the media library for some reason – it was there but the images wouldn’t appear. Had to get the IT guy at the Canada web host to migrate it for me. When it finally resolved, at least it looked pretty good.

Made a cauliflower and chickpea piccata for dinner, with roasted cauliflower in the classic lemon-caper dressing – surprisingly tastt. Watched the opening episode of House of Dragon Slow at first, but we’re getting pulled in…

November 9, 2022

Went for a run in the Woods before work. I turned off the audio settings and opted to listen to my audio book, which I keep falling asleep to when I try to listen in bed. Bumped into Alicia and stopped for a brief chat. Even with that, my time was an improvement on my weekend effort.

Spent most of the work day building the purpose economy website, which is coming together nicely.

Lyra found a louse in her hair this morning. Pretty clear it’s come from school as they sent an email yesterday saying there were cases of it in her year. She showered as soon as she got in, and I spent an hour nitcombing her. It’s been long time  a long time since I’ve had to do that. Didn’t find much – a couple of immature lice – so let’s hope that’s the end of it. 

November 8, 2022

Got Lyra sorted for school, then walked down for my regular swim in the pond. The temperature is holding steady at the moment, and I’m getting to really enjoy it. I think I actually prefer swimming in this cooler temperature to  the summer.

Had a meeting with my engineering clients – our monthly catch up. I’ve got a number of things I should be doing for them, and somehow they always get demoted behind other work. Made a point of picking two things off the list directly after the meeting.

Our new draft excluders arrived today. They are constructed of two door width pool noodles connected lengthwise with a thin strip of fabric. You wriggle the fabric under the bottom of the door and the two noodles align on either side. 

Penne with zucchini and ricotta for dinner. As there was no ricotta in the shop, I ended up making my own, which is pretty straightforward to do and produced a delicious, delicate cheese. 

November 7, 2022

Went for my first run in too long. Did a gentle couple of miles round the Woods. Always good to put that marker in the sand to build on.

Lyra went round to Liz’s after school and stayed for dinner again. It was kitchri for us, another old favourite. Sort of an Indian take on congee, where rice is boiled to mush, along with mung beans. I always add spinach, onions (slow-cooked in Indian spices), and mushrooms to mine. Very satisfying winter fare, and a good dish to have when Lyra isn’t eating with us.

November 6, 2022

Sunday swim this weekend. We went down later than normal, which was fine though definitely busier. I’m amazed at how many people are into doing this.

In the afternoon, Adam headed over to visit Beulah. When he got back, we decided it was time to put the heating on. We set it to come on for two hours in the morning and four in the evening. It took a while to get the upstairs radiators working. There must have been an airlock in the system, because we had to bleed them twice to get things working.

Liz came round to hang out with Lyra. Chilli for dinner – haven’t made that in ages…

November 5, 2022

Planned to go swimming this morning, but Adam was sleeping like a log what with the jetlag and I headed upstairs and left him to have a lie-in. The weather wasn’t very appealing by the time he finally emerged and we gave it a miss.

Lyra came back from the Dalston car boot with Ava and hung out here for a while. I’m very fond of Ava – she’s such a nice kid. After she left, Lyra and I watched a documentary about Woodstock 1999 – what a shitshow that was…

November 4, 2022

Drove down to the bus stop with Adam and Lyra, saw her off then went for a walk on the Heath. It was a crisp, bright morning and there was a nice view over London from Kite Hill. Adam usually does his morning walk with Doron, but he’s gone off on a boys’ weekend so I filled in.

Lyra went back to Liz’s after school ended up staying over. Her stomach still isn’t great but it’s manageable. It’s strange that she and Adam both get these issues.

Adam ordered a takeaway from Dishoom, which was delicious. I haven’t eaten there in ages – it’s become so popular and doesn’t take reservations, so unless you’re willing to queue for 45 minutes there’s no chance of getting a table. 

November 3, 2022

Adam is back from his travels! Though I barely got to see him before heading into town for a three hour meeting with the beauty team to talk about website developments.

Did some shopping on Oxford Street afterwards – mainly John Lewis to pick up some wool for a knitting project, but did some browsing as well, what with Christmas coming.

Lyra made it to school today. Her stomach is still sore, but she’s feeling better than yesterday. I really wish we could work out the cause of the stomach issues and how to manage them. I believe there’s a stress element, and that it might be linked to the migraines (childrens’ migraines often manifest in the stomach).

Nova called me while I was out from A&E. She’s developed a nasty eye infection – the optometrist thought it might be a corneal ulcer and sent her to the hospital. They’ve ruled that out, but there is a very serious infection that they need to test for. Until the results come back, she is to apply antibiotic eyedrops on the hour. My poor girls…

November 2, 2022

Lyra’s stomachache hasn’t shifted, and she wasn’t well enough to return to school. She does seem to be feeling a bit better, which is enouraging, though she’s adamant that the meds aren’t making any difference. It’s always more worse when you don’t know the root cause of an ailment…

Started my work day with the invoicing. October was a  pretty slow month workwise. I did put in a lot of hours on the trauma copy, which I’m underbilling for, but I haven’t felt very motivated to tackle my other projects. 

My Twitter feed has been filling up with more and more posts about the trans rights issue. I’m not sure whether this is because there is more being said about it or because the algorithm is feeding me things based on what I’ve clicked on. Probably both… I try to read comments from different perspectives, but thing are so polarised that I’m put off by both sides.

It seems to me that the whole concept of gender is problematic. If “gender is a social construct” as the girls have made clear to me, then how can anyone be a gender? If society says that women typically are nurturing and gentle, like fashion, beauty, are less assertive or whatever, and men typically have different qualities, and your interests and traits don’t happen to align with that construct, how could that possibly mean that you aren’t a woman or are meant to be a man?

And how does conforming to an evolving social construct make someone “a woman”? I guess it depends what the word means to you. I grew up in a world where it meant “adult female”, but the definition of woman and the right to be called “a woman” and have “womens rights” accorded is being fought over. But aren’t we talking about “female rights”, such as in sports where there is sex-based separation so that females can compete meaningfully and safely with one another? 

Nobody can know what it feels like to “be a woman” – we can only know what it feels like to be ourselves. We might feel unhappy that we don’t match what we believe society expects us to be, and opt to alter our appearance to look more like a woman or man. I have no issue with that. We all make choices about how we present ourselves – clothes, makeup, hairstyle, tattoos, cosmetic surgery.

On that note, was Michael Jackson white? Applying a similar logic, surely the answer would be yes I think. But enough of that…

My ladies exercise charity popped up to resolve a problem with them classfinder I built for them more than a year ago. It was working when I handed it over and for many months afterwards – how long am I meant  to be responsible for its upkeep?

Went to the cinema with Jane to see Triangle of Sadness, which was pretty funny. Got absolutely drenched on the journey home. All that rain we didn’t get this summer has now arrived…

November 1, 2022

Rabbits! Ran into Lynne at the pond and we did a lap together. It was pelting with rain and very windy. The tree branches were lashing about and the lifeguards kept shouting warnings to stay away from the edges in case a branch fell on us.

Walked up to the village together afterwards, and learned all about her plans to spend Christmas in South America with Duncan, Vince & Danni, and Helen. Their three children are travelling together for six months, and they are going out to see them.

Lyra has one of her stomach aches…:-(  Managed to get her a doctor’s appointment in the afternoon and accompanied her down there. Went through all the symptoms and they doctor had her up on the table and probed her abdomen. I dropped her home then headed into the village to collect her prescriptions – a laxative and an antacid medication. All in all, I didn’t get much work done.

Out with Gilda in the evening to see Monica Ali at Lauderdale House. Had a  drink first at the Dukes Head, and caught up with what’s been going on in her life. She’s left the art journalism world and become a practicing artiist herself, creating textile versions of art works. Also, they are moving into Annie Lennox’s former house in South Grove (next door to the former George Michael house).

I’d brought my novel along and got Monica to inscribe it to Lyra after the talk…