 |
 |
 |
|
Nova dressing up
|
||
 |
 |
 |
|
Lyra at home
|
||
 |
 |
 |
|
The sisters
|
||
 |
 |
 |
|
Feeding Lyra
|
||
 |
 |
 |
|
In the recovery room
|
||
March 31, 2007Nick and Jane came round this evening to cook us dinner. Baby Frea looks so mature compared to Lyra, although there actually isn’t all that much difference in size… We settled both babies in our room, then sat down to a proscuitto-pear-watercress salad, fish pie and raspberries and mango with vanilla ice cream.Lovely evening, although I stayed up too late, and had a bit too much wine. I wasn’t swinging from the chandeliers or anything like that — two and half glasses is a bit too much for me these days… Lyra obliged us by sleeping five hours straight, and it was gone 1am by the time I got to bed. |
||||||||
March 30, 2007Lyra didn’t sleep all day. I didn’t think it was actually possible for a baby to go that long without sleeping… We’ve noticed that her cradle is squeaking quite a bit, which may be disturbing her. She may be a getting too big for it already. We’re going to tighten the screws, and oil it, and if that doesn’t work we’ll have to assemble the big cot.We’ve done a work swap with Etta’s mum Sara who’s an architect. Adam is going to write the copy for her website and she’s going to do some drawings for the renovations on our flat. I’ve been helping him with the work, which I’m happy to do — it’s just finding the time to do it in… I picked up Nova from school this afternoon. She seemed to be the only kid in a bonnet, though there were a couple wearing rabbit ears. Apparently, a few of the other girls were very envious, and she seems to have promised to make bonnets for Etta, Evelyn and Oscar W… (It used to wind me up a bit when I’d do something like make a bonnet or actually bake something for the bake sale, and one of the other mums would say, “Oh, I used to do that sort of thing when I only had one child!” I always thought it was patronising, and didn’t really believe either… I am pleased that we still managed to get her bonnet together with next to no notice even with the new baby.) My Harry Belafonte CD arrived from Amazon today. I hadn’t thought of Harry Belafonte in years, but recently felt the need to listen to his music. It has proved a big hit with Lyra. She was in the middle of a to-do, but calmed down the minute Harry started singing “Midnight Special”. Mum liked Harry Belafonte, and I can remember singing “Jamaica Farewell” and “Marianne” with her when I was a little girl. Coincidentally, Harry Belafonte was born on 1 March 1927, eighty years to the day before Lyra… |
||||||||
March 29, 2007Simonia came for an extra day this week. She picked up Nova from school and took her to her ballet class. In theory, it should be a real bonus having Simonia for a few hours a week now that the baby is here, but actually I not that comfortable with the concept of having “help”. I don’t really like telling people what to do…There was a letter in Nova’s school bag telling us that tomorrow was “mufti day” (where they wear their own clothes) and that “Easter bonnets were welcomed”. “Oh, I love Easter bonnets!” Nova cried. So after dinner, we managed to find time to make her an Easter bonnet — cut out a cardboard “doughnut”, lined the underside with floral wrapping paper, made tissue paper flowers for the top, cut out tissue paper leaves to fill in the gaps, and stapled on a ribbon to hold it in place. She was thrilled with it, and went to bed planning her outfit to wear with it tomorrow… |
||||||||
March 28, 2007I took Lyra down to the Whittington this afternoon so the paediatrican could check out her jaundice. We walked down in the pram (I’m not insured to drive for another two weeks), which was good exercise for me, especially the return leg.The doctor took one look at her, and didn’t even bother testing her blood. Apparently, jaundice isn’t really a concern any more at this point… They weighed her though, and she now weighs 4.9kg or almost 11lb. I was pleased with that until I got home and graphed it in her “red book” (her official health record) and saw that she’s dropping fast on the weight chart. She’s now down from the 99.7% to the 91% line. No doubt they’ll give me stick about that next time I take her to the health visitor… |
||||||||
March 27, 2007Lyra has quite dry, flaky skin (except on her face and head where it is oily and covered with small, white bumps). The midwives have advised me to rub her down regularly with olive oil. Now I wasn’t a meat eater when Nova was a baby, but giving Lyra her daily oiling always puts me in mind of preparing a chicken for roasting… |
||||||||
March 26, 2007A hopeless night’s sleep… I didn’t doze much during last night’s feeding sessions for some reason…Pat came with us on the school drop-off, then treated us to breakfast at Cafe Rouge — croque madames and cafes au lait all round. Finning sent a car to pick him up and drive him to Staffordshire at 12pm. He’ll spend the week up there talking about the job, and looking at houses and schools for his boys before making his decision. It would be great if they end up moving to the UK — I’m sure we’d have some fun together… |
||||||||
March 25, 2007Birthday brunch for Adam round at Freddy and Beulahs: bagels, salmon, salami, chopped egg etc., and one of Beulah’s cheesecakes for dessert. All the family was there — ten of us now. Adam got new hiking trousers and socks, so he’s completely kitted out and ready for an assault on K2…;-)My friend Pat Boeker arrived from Canada this afternoon. He’s been offered a job at Finning UK, and is over to check it out. Great to see him — although it’s been a good seven years since I’ve seen him, we picked up right where we left off. Once Nova was settled for the night, we got an Indian takeaway and worked our way through a couple of bottles of red before jetlag and new parent exhaustion sent us all to our beds at a relatively respectable 11pm… |
||||||||
March 24, 2007I’ve been looking back at website entries from when Nova was a baby. It shows me how unreliable memories can be. The Nova of my memory was a complete marvel, a prodigy of early milestones. But I discover that by 5 and a half weeks her main achievements were pivoting around her head, making alarming gasping sounds, and poking herself in the eye. I think Lyra’s on course for achieving those…;-) |
||||||||
March 22, 2007It was “watch week” at Nova’s ballet class, which presented the logistical challenge of dovetailing Nova’s and Lyra’s schedules. In the end, Simonia picked up Nova, took her to class and got her into her leotard, while I fed Lyra then pushed her up in the pram. We swapped the pram in Pond Square, and Simonia took the baby for a walk in the park, while I watched Nova’s class.They seem much improved since I last attended in early Feb. (Actually, I haven’t properly watched a class since the last “watch week” — I generally slope off to the coffee shop with the other mums.) There is a performance with costumes and everything planned for July, and following that, they start preparing for examinations to advance to the next level. I’d expected Nova to give up on ballet before it got to the exam stage — I certainly did… |
||||||||
March 21, 2007On Pasc’s recommendation, I recently read The Waves by Virginia Woolf. I’ve really enjoyed some of Woolf’s novels (particularly To the Lighthouse and Orlando), but I found The Waves nearly unreadable. There were small children spouting sentences like: “Now I will wrap my agony inside my pocket-handkerchief. It shall be screwed tight into a ball. I will go to the beech wood alone, before lessons. I will not sit at a table, doing sums.” I thought, “There’s no way that Pasc can actually like this pretentious nonsense,” but when I asked her about it, she claimed it was her favourite book. That being said, she last read it as a university student (say no more)…It got me wondering how much I would actually now enjoy the books I loved in my teens/twenties. In last night’s breastfeeding marathon, I composed a list of books I aim to reread:
Following the logic through, I should also reread things I hated at the time, such as:
|
||||||||
March 20, 2007Happy birthday, Adam! Adam went off shopping when I got back. I’m buying him a new pair of hiking boots for his birthday. He returned with a whole lot of other stuff besides: new raincoat, merino wool pullover, jeans, cds… We went for lunch at the Bull, a local pub. Lyra dozed until I was half way through my main course, then joined us for a two course lunch herself. We’d chosen a discreet table, so I was able to breastfeed her without too many onlookers. (I remember getting so used to breastfeeding in public last time that I’d sometimes forget to cover up at all…) Lyra ate relentlesslly all afternoon and into the evening, straight through birthday cake and champagne with Pete, Pasc and co. Eventually, Adam gave her a top up bottle while I did Nova’s bedtime. I’m absolutely wiped out, what with two terrible night’s sleep and a bit of alcohol. Fast asleep on the couch by 9:30. |
||||||||
March 19, 2007My first full solo day with Lyra. We had a rotten night to kick it off. Lyra never slept more than an hour between feeds that lasted one to two hours. I finally got her settled at 9:30am, and had a nap myself.When Simonia came midafternoon, I took the opportunity to pop to the village to pick up a few things for Adam’s birthday tomorrow. I don’t think I would have been so relaxed about leaving Nova when she was only two weeks old, but perhaps I forget… Dinner was smoked salmon lentil salad. I’m rediscovering those things I couldn’t eat when pregnant like smoked salmon and blue cheese. Pate is also on my to-do list, as are raw oysters… |
||||||||
March 18, 2007It’s Mother’s Day in the UK. I don’t know why the do it on a different date to North America — Father’s Day is always the same.Nova and Adam brought me breakfast in bed, and there was a lovely card from Nova as well. Adam bought me a ring a couple of days ago. It’s to mark the birth of Lyra, but doubles up nicely as a Mother’s Day gift.
He and Nova headed off to see Beulah before swimming, while I spent some quality time with the baby. She flatout refused to sleep, which was a bit tiresome. But at least it meant she was good and tired when we went out for a family lunch at Strada. She zonked out on the five minute walk to the restaurant, and slept through the whole meal: pizza and a glass of red wine. Didn’t bother with dinner this evening — just some cheese and crackers in front of an installment of my current movie: Gunfight at OK Corral. Kirk Douglas is great as terminally ill gambler Doc Holliday who forms an unlikely alliance with upstanding lawman Wyatt Earp played by Burt Lancaster. |
||||||||
March 17, 2007Lyra has finally regained her birthweight. The midwives discharged us this afternoon, which is great news. However, as she still has a touch of jaundice, I’ll need to take her down to the Whittington to be checked by the paediatrician. It’s a bit of a drag, but I’d feel terrible if I ignored their advice and it turned out that her liver isn’t working properly…Eytan, Dina and their two little boys came round for a visit. It was good to see them, but they ended up staying too long. I couldn’t get Lyra settled with all the hubbub, and she got fractious and overtired. What with all the breastfeeding, I’ve been watching a lot of movies (in small installments). Saw a great one the other day called Bombon El Perro. It’s an Argentinian movie about an unemployed fifty something guy, down on his luck, who’s given a pedigree dogo (a kind of huge mastiff), which completely changes his fortune. It’s a lovely, gentle film. |
||||||||
March 16, 2007Adam and I took Lyra to school to pick up Nova today. Alice was there as well, and the two babies held court in the big playground while I queued to pick up Nova. I returned to find a circle of mums and kids gathered round the two prams, cooing and making silly faces. People seem to think she looks a lot like Nova, which is true.They both have the long, almond eyes, and the nose and mouth are similar as well. Privately, I always thought that Nova bore an unfortunate resemblance to the comedian Mel Smith, while definitely Lyra is definitely more of a Jo Brand type.
|
||||||||
March 15, 2007The side effects of the fenugreek tea linger, although I’m in a lot less pain this morning… It’s a shame, as I definitely have more milk today. I’ll definitely give myself a few days off, and halve the recipe if I try it again.The health visitor came round this afternoon. They visit each new mother once to examine the baby, assess the home environment, talk you through the vaccination programme, and explain the services they offer. She can still see a bit of jaundice in Lyra, and is keen for me to take her to the Whittington for a paediatric assessment, and also seemed concerned that I would have adequate support once Adam returns to work. Personally, compared to last time, I think it’ll be a walk in the park… |
||||||||
March 14, 2007It’s much harder to settle the baby when Nova is around… I’d always thought of her as a quiet little girl, but she actually makes quite a bit of noise. Lyra’s going to have to get used to it — we can’t have the rest of the household tiptoeing round her, but it is a bit depressing to finally get Lyra settled only to have Nova wake her one minute later by jumping off the sofa with a great crash directly over her head…Nova played at home in the morning, then went over to her friend Sophie’s at lunch for a few hours. It’s parent teacher day so school is cancelled. For the first time, Adam went to our appointment. According to Nova’s teacher, “she’s in a league of her own” when it comes to literacy, and is at the top of the class for math, doing well socially, and widening her network of playmates. Interestingly, the other children often come to Nova for help with their schoolwork as “she can read the instructions and explain it to them” So, all good news… I’ve had to give up the fenugreek tea, as it was really upsetting my stomach. It came on quite suddenly, and I was starting to worry that something was really wrong, until I thought to look up the possible side effects from fenugreek, and saw that intestinal distress was the first thing listed… |
||||||||
March 13, 2007Walked Nova to school this morning (Lyra was napping). Lots of hugs from other mums and plenty of well intentioned “you look amazings!” Had a quick coffee with Pasc and Phyl on the way home. Nice to be out on my own for a little bit…Started my fenugreek tea regime this morning: two heaped teaspoons, two fennel tea bags and a big spoon of honey per pot of tea. Can’t hurt… We found the perfect place for Adam’s 40th birthday weekend. We’re planning to go away with our two oldest sets of friends — Pete and Liana, and Ben and Michaela, and their four little girls. Adam found a great house to rent in Rutland, which is reasonablly convenient for everyone, and we’ve agreed a weekend at the end of April. |
||||||||
March 12, 2007Did some research on the internet into increasing breast milk production. Everything we read suggests that stopping top-up feeding is very difficult. It was reassuring to discover that I’ve been instinctively doing all the right things — letting her nurse as often as she likes, giving her both breasts at every feed, and even “switch nursing” (swapping her back and forth). Apparently, it’s very unusual for mothers not to produce enough milk, as long as they persevere. The only thing recommended for increasing milk production is a herbal tea made from steeping fenugreek seeds, so I’ll give that a go…I wore real (ie, non-elasticated waist) clothes for the first time today, which was a nice feeling. My abdomen is still pretty stretched and distended, but I think it’s shrinking… I’ve been quite good about doing the recommended abdominal exercises. Dave and Pasc both arrived for visits at lunch time, so we all ate together. Something (the beetroot-walnut dip?) caused a reaction in my mouth. My soft palate and roof of my mouth came up in little bumps, which wasn’t very nice. It looked bright red in the mirror, and you could actually see the little bumps… It put me in mind of an unfortunate radio programme I’d listened to the other day. It was the kind of programme I can really do without hearing, about the rise in food allergies and intolerances in modern society. All these people phoned in to tell stories about how they’d developed life threatening allergies to the most innocuous foods like apples in their middle or later years. One woman had managed to develop a phobia about eating around history, by which she meant anything older than World War 2. Apparently, if she was having her lunch and the Antique Road Show came on television her throat completely squeezes shut… Took Lyra to Crouch End to buy fenugreek seeds and get some photos developed. The pram is good, but it’ll be great being able to wear the sling, as shops in Britain are often so small and cramped. |
||||||||
March 11, 2007Another sleepless night with the baby faced tyrant. Lots of desultory feeding and dozing in my arms. We both managed a couple of hours sleep when Adam and Nova went swimming, but that was about it. Lyra is happiest being held, and I’m pretty happy to hold her, so it works for now…Lunch was a bed picnic, which we were just finishing up when the midwife arrived. Lyra has regained some weight, but hasn’t reached her birthweight, so they won’t discharge us yet. The midwife didn’t respond to my questions about how to stop topping her up once she’s up to birthweight, just kept suggesting that we give Lyra more frequent, larger bottles (which I have no intention of doing). When we said that sucking back large quantities of formula seems to upset her stomach, she told us to give her Infacol, which is some sort of colic treatment. It’s that usual “one intervention leading to another” bullshit you always seem to encounter with medical types. I was quite demoralised by the time the midwife left, and thinking I may have to resign myself to bottle feeding this little one… Adam cooked a spirit raising roast dinner — chicken, roast potatoes and green beans. It was his first effort, and turned out really well, aside from the gravy… Neither of us has the knack of making gravy yet… |
||||||||
March 10, 2007I spend hours in our bedroom/nursery pinned under a breastfeeding baby. Our phones have a internal call button that makes the phone ring upstairs. I’ve also called Adam’s mobile a few times, and even texted him once or twice requesting water…Freddy and Beulah popped round this evening with a gift for Lyra — a Baby Bjorn carrier, which should be really useful, especially as Lyra loves to be held all the time (I don’t remember Nova wanting so much holding…) I’ll need to build up my abdominals a bit more first. Tonight at bedtime, Nova told me that whenever she used to do her Cinderella talking book story, and it asked her to make a wish, she always wished for a baby sister. “You never told me that,” I said to her. “You can’t tell wishes or they won’t come true,” she told me. I can’t helping thinking that those wishes must have helped make this pregnancy work out… |
||||||||
March 9, 2007Happy fourth birthday Liam! Used some of my rest time to make spaghetti and meatballs for dinner, then got a couple of phone calls, by which time Lyra was awake again. After eating dinner I was completely wiped out, and in bed at 9pm. The usual hazy interludes of breastfeeding, dozing with Lyra in my arms, comforting and nappy changing followed. Adam gave her an evening bottle, then another at 5am (we want to fatten her up for the midwife’s visit tomorrow), and I actually managed a few hours of uninterrupted sleep. |
||||||||
March 8, 2007Spent the whole night breastfeeding and dozing with Lyra in my arms… I’d wake up every couple of hours, with no idea how much she’d been feeding. Any attempt to put her down, would result in her waking up and starting the cycle again. Finally got her settled in her cot about 5am…When Nova came in at 6am I was actually asleep. I know because she woke me up to tell me that she wouldn’t be waking me until 7am. She also bumped heavily into the cot waking Lyra as well. More feeding ensued… It’s a tricky time for Nova. She’s being very good, but it’s a big adjustment for her. I want her life to continue as normally as possible, having her friends over, bouncing round the living room when she wants to, and spending lots of time with mum and dad. Got a lovely flower arrangement from Greg and Wendy, with a helium balloon that Nova promptly claimed for her new baby game. |
||||||||
March 7, 2007Pretty good night… Lyra slept four hours, and it’s rare for me to get that much sleep in one go… Another bonus, I was even able to get up and have breakfast with Nova before she left for school.Had some more Nova time after dinner — it felt just like the old days. Once the baby gets into a routine, it would be worth having her nap either through the morning or early evening, so we have solo time with Nova. She’s been really good about the new arrival, but it is a huge adjustment for her… |
||||||||
March 6, 2007Today’s visitors: She is keen for us to keep topping Lyra up with bottles. I’m not very happy about the idea, mostly because breast milk production works on a feedback mechanism — the more she needs, the more I produce, and giving her bottles works against that. Also, glugging down a big bottle seems to upset her stomach, and rather than knocking her out as you might expect, we tend to spend half an hour winding and soothing her and topping up her top up with another breastfeed before settling her in her cot. Evelyn came round for a playdate, and Nova graciously let her hold Lyra first. (She’s learned what it takes to get along with Evelyn…) They soon lost interest in babies and spent the rest of the time playing really nicely together. Nova was wearing the new red dress Adam and I bought her this evening, teamed with my “wedding” hat. When I asked her why she chose to pair the dress with the hat, she replied, “because I like to be at the height of fashion at all times.” Alicia came round again to drop off a gorgeous chicken stew, and a dish of baked apples for our dessert. It was so sweet of her, and a real treat for both of us — almost as good as going to a restaurant. Treated myself to a small glass of white wine. Life is good… |
||||||||
March 5, 2007Some things I’d forgotten about new babies:
I hadn’t forgotten the pain of those first few clamps… I have a mental checklist I run though each time she squawks. Is baby:
So far with Lyra it seems to be more milk that’s needed… |
||||||||
March 4, 2007Happy birthday, Ceinwen… David called with his congratulations, and confirmed that they are coming over for three and a half weeks in the summer. I chatted away with Ceinwen, completely forgetting it was her birthday. She was very mature about it, and said I must be very tired from having a baby. At least we’d sent a gift already… Speaking of gifts, we got a great parcel from Margo and Aaron: a lovely umbrella for Nova, some bath soak for me, and two nifty cordless nightlights that Adam can use when he gets up with Lyra in the night…;-) |
||||||||
March 3, 2007I had a reasonable night, considering that Lyra fed nearly the whole time… She’s showing signs of jaundice, and I have to ensure that she gets as much food as possible, at least one feed every three hours. I also gave her one bottle in the night.The midwife wasn’t very unhelpful, suggesting I should trek off to the milk kitchen and make it myself, but I was quite bolshie with her and she eventually went off and fetched it. The doctor visited in the morning and said that everything seems fine and I’m okay to be discharged. Forty-eight hours seems a pretty quick turnaround for major abdominal surgery, but I think I’m ready… He removed my pressure bandage and inspected my wound, which is healing nicely. I’ve been sewn up with dissolvable stitches (I mean the outer layer — apparently, they have to sew together seven layers) Everyone who’s seen it (that doesn’t include me) exclaims over the neat stitching and the fact they’ve used dissolvable stitches… Lyra is still jaundiced, and has lost some weight, which is to be expected. It’s not easy making the switch from food on tap to having to fend for herself. Even though I’d been cleared for discharge, it took until late afternoon for them to get around to doing the paperwork. It was 4pm by the time we set off. Adam had parked the car at Eytan and Dina’s, which is a good walk up Dartmouth Park Hill. I shuffled along slowly, one slipper in front of the other — it took about fifteen minutes… The visitors started the minute we arrived: Anne from next door, then Trish with her two kids Ravi and Safra, then Jemima, Rob and Ruby, then Doron, Antonia, Ollie and Marni… Ruby was particularly sweet with the baby. She made a terrific card and brought over a few of her baby toys to give to Lyra as well, Things finally quieted down about 8:30pm. Adam made sausages with bubble and squeak and once I’d settled Lyra in her cot and Nova in her bed, I hauled my bulk upstairs for some dinner, It is nice to be home… |
||||||||
March 2, 2007Day two… At noon, a no-nonsense midwife came along and told me it was time to get up on my feet. I was happy to give it a try. I looped my catheter bag over my arm (the latest “it” bag from Damien Hirst…) bum shuffled myself to the edge of the bed, staggered to my feet and lurched off down the corridor behind her. Happily, there was no mention of the shower they frogmarched me the day after Nova’s birth. (That’s a small mercy — the last thing I feel like doing is getting my wound wet.) Another midwife came along and gave the baby a bath. She wasn’t that keen on it, but the oil in the bath water should help with her dry skin. So what is this new baby like? She’s a big girl, more powerfully built than Nova, and not quite as long. She has a deeper chest, a smaller tummy, and chubbier legs and arms (Nova’s legs were like sad little drumsticks). She’s a nice pinky red colour, with a galaxy of little white spots on her nose, a small amount dark brown hair, muddy indeterminate eyes, with long slanted eyelids (the same as Novas). Her head is smaller, and perfect for cradling in the palm of your hand. Adam brought Nova in for a visit after school, and she held her little sister for the first time. We’d held off on naming the baby until we’d consulted with Nova. From the two names on our shortlist — Lyra and Decca — Nova chose Lyra, so it’s Lyra Fern. Moved to a private room about 5pm. It’s still not exactly quiet, but the sound is muffled and the extra space, and semi-private bathroom is nice. Pasc dropped in for a visit, bearing a Metro newspaper, box of fudge, and some pampery toiletry stuff. She also collected my dinner — cauliflower cheese, green salad, and yogurt, not too bad. |
||||||||
March 1, 2007Woke up at 6am to take my pre-op stomach acid pill on schedule. Packed a bag for Nova, got her fed and ready for school, then walked her up to Pasc’s. She’s going to stay with them overnight, and they’ll take her in to school as well. I felt quite emotional leaving her…Arrived at the labour ward at 8am, and was given a bed. They were scheduled to do woman in next bay first, but she’d foolishly eaten breakfast, so I moved to the front of the queue. Visits from the midwife, doctor and anaethesist were all really confidence inspiring — they each talked through their part of the procedure with me and answered any questions. I went into theatre about 10am, where the rest of the team was gradually assembling. The was a Roger Daltry lookalike with shoulder length curls, Eugenia the anaethetist’s assistant, Mary the midwife, Dr Bartlett (a jet black, bookish looking African), Dr Tischner (a little Dutch? Austrian? woman), and a couple of others. The senior anaethetist was very competent, with a wonderful bedside manner. They started by putting a canula in arm (a needle the size of a biro), and an epidural in my back. Judging from the way it felt going in, I’m glad I didn’t see what that one looked like… There were two medical students observing, clutching their little clinical evidence guides like prayer books. They must be pretty new, as I could have answered far more of the questions they were asked than they seemed able to. Once the anaesthetic took effect, the team rolled into action. It was very calm, professional, unhurried… I could hear them chatting and joking behind the drape across my chest as they cut me open. So different to that team they scraped together for my emergency c-section: a doctor who looked about seventeen, and a few unlikely looking characters — it could have been the cleaner and parking attendant for all we knew… A few minutes into the procedure my blood pressure dropped dramatically. I felt very sick, everything went white, and I felt as if I couldn’t breathe. I’m pretty sure I heard them say it was 80/45. It was very unpleasant and quite scary, but only lasted for five or ten minutes. The anaethetist stroked my hair and kept saying reassuring things throughout, keeping us up to date on the procedure. I felt a hard, rib cracking push and our baby appeared over the top of the drape. She looked enormous, much bigger than Nova. She was covered in vernix and yelling her head off. They cleaned her up a bit and weighed her (10lb 3oz, 49cm — “she was never coming out any other way” one of the doctors said) then brought her to me to hold. Lots of stitching followed — they cut through seven layers, and rejoin major nerves as well. Apparently I lost “a lot of blood” (700ml) — maybe the reason for the blood pressure drop? — but happily didn’t need a transfusion. Once they were done, we moved to the recovery room for four hours of monitoring. We had our first breast feed, which was a bit tricky as I had absolutely no feeling below my breasts, and it was difficult to position the baby. She was a determined little sucker though, and we managed a decent feed. The whole thing was very calm and quiet — we were the only people in the recovery room, there was a view of the trees on Dartmouth Park Hill through the window. Adam took a few photos, then went off to make phone calls, and I lay there holding her. She’s such a perfect, beautiful little thing. It really is a miracle… In the late afternoon they wheeled me up to Murray Ward, settling me in a nice berth at the end, with a neighbour only on one side. The feeling was slowly creeping back into my body, and the nurse brought pain pills, checked my catheter, and wound. It was still oozing blood, so they applied a pressure bandage. I had my first meal of tea and toast in the early evening. I felt like I could have managed a large pepperoni pizza, but they want you to ease back onto the food slowly… The baby’s blood sugar is too low, which can be a problem for large babies. The pediatrician has decided on top-up feeds of formula after she has breastfed. Adam did one before he had to leave at 9pm, then the midwives did a night one and another in the morning. Once she gets three consecutive okay readings from the heel prick tests they’ll leave her alone… I didn’t really sleep… It’s quite noisy on an open ward, and the woman next to me — “breakfast lady” — was a bit of a pest. She was either snoring, complaining, moaning in pain, or sending people off to make her hot chocolate. She seemed to have no interest in feeding her baby, in spite of warnings from the midwife that he was getting dehydrated… Pretty uncharitable of me I guess, but I felt like telling her to shut the fuck up… |
